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[sheepworrying]

"I had NOTHING TO DO with that and you KNOW IT! You can't prove anything! I know my rights! I was nowhere near that field!

... that said, uh, helloooo! Go ahead and leave a message."

Comments

I'm a late late monster. Action.

[ergomaniac]

[Edgeworth comes into the jail and sits down at a table, waiting for his client with his brow slightly furrowed.]

So am I. :D

[sheepworrying]

[A few minutes later Wolf comes slinking in, looking for all the world like a puppy somebody kicked. He glances at Edgeworth, takes a few deep breaths (sniffing??) and finally, nervously settles into the chair.]

Hrrrrr... Mister Edgeworth, I presume?

OH SHIT SERIOUSLY, YOU REPLIED TO THIS, hrngh

[ergomaniac]

Indeed.

[Edgeworth crosses his arms and looks his client over. He...certainly appears a shady customer - but that's irrelevant.

Well. Irrelevant for his own purposes. Maybe not so much when it came to the courtroom phase of the trial.]

Would that we might have met under better circumstances, I suppose.

lmao, DON'T WORRY, BRO.

[sheepworrying]

You're tellin' me... [And he's definitely acting suspicious too, looking more like a... distressed stray dog than anything. His eyes are shifty and he moves erratically, occasionally scratching behind his ear.]

Huff-puff, Mr. Edgeworth, it's really just... too good of you to be doing this for me!

[ergomaniac]

Everyone is entitled to representation - you no less than any other. Ergo, it is precisely as good as it should be.

Before we begin, though - do you have any complaints? About your treatment in here, et cetera?

[sheepworrying]

Not where I come from. [He sighs, relieved. If this was back in the 9 Kingdoms, Wolf would have been put to the torch hours after Leah's death.]

And you're darn right I've got complaints! Cripes, it's blatant discrimination that put me in here! They're judging me before they even know me!

[ergomaniac]

...Well, keeping you in detention prior to the trial is...how things are done.

[sheepworrying]

They shouldn't have arrested me to begin with! There's just... NO WAY I could have hurt my darling little Leahkins, no matter what they say!

[ergomaniac]

And the truth of the matter is what the court shall determine.

[sheepworrying]

[He huffs resolutely, shaking his head.]

It is the truth! I'm almost sure of it!

[ergomaniac]

...Quite. Why only "almost"?

[sheepworrying]

... because. Uh.

[After a moment of very guilty-looking hemming and hawing.]

I really. Don't. Quite. Remember... anything from that night.

[ergomaniac]

[...Naturally.]

Go on.

[sheepworrying]

[He coughs, a bit uncomfortably. Oh, he's sat around trying to come up with a brilliant lie for this that everyone will believe, but the fact is that it's far too obvious for him to lie about. He'll be found out for sure.]

Well you see, Mr. Edgeworth... I'm... different. I am not, what you might call, of a certain pedigree most common among the people of this fine city, as well as my own time and place.

Namely... human.

[ergomaniac]

[He manages by some superhuman force of will to keep from pulling a face.]

What, then, are you?

[sheepworrying]

I'm, uh... a half-wolf.

[ergomaniac]

And the other half is...human, I presume?

[sheepworrying]

Well, it's... enough for me to pass, most of the time. It's kind of complicated.

[ergomaniac]

I'm capable of following complicated thoughts.

[sheepworrying]

Well... well I don't really know how it works, exactly. How people like me exist back home. But we do, and we're not human and we're not all wolves, we're just half-wolves.

So you see, despite what the rumors back home would have you believe, I am a noble creature. Strong and fast. Got a good sense of smell. A particular affinity for fine dining. A splendid fashion sense. Got a tail, too.

[ergomaniac]

And you also suffer from sudden bouts of amnesia.

[sheepworrying]

Er, no. You see... [He speaks very casually, almost like he's trying to sell Edgeworth a car instead of offering a very shady alibi for the night of the murder.] Being a half-wolf, I also have natural obsession with the moon. The full moon, as a matter of fact. I get a little moody, a little stir-crazy, my appetite shoots through the roof, you know, typical wolf stuff, as I understand it.

So if you'll check the calendar, you'll see that the full moon was up in the sky the night my little Leahkins died. So as a result of my, er... unique condition, I can't remember anything after the sun went down on the night of the murder! Only little bits and pieces!

[... he says proudly, like that's going to help him.]

[ergomaniac]

[This is a disaster. Edgeworth nevertheless manages to keep his dismay under control.

Sort of.]

Describe those...bits and pieces.

[sheepworrying]

[Wolf sounds very confident of this next part!]

Well, I went home from work at 6, like normal. Then I did what I always do, tied myself up and locked myself inside my apartment so I couldn't get out and cause trouble while I was suffering from my monthly cycle! And the rest is just me thrashing around the house.

Next thing I know, it's morning and the cops are banging down my door, calling me a murderer!

[ergomaniac]

[...Wait. That doesn't sound disastrous at all.]

How do you tie yourself up?