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[sheepworrying]

"I had NOTHING TO DO with that and you KNOW IT! You can't prove anything! I know my rights! I was nowhere near that field!

... that said, uh, helloooo! Go ahead and leave a message."

Comments

[sheepworrying]

Well, it's... enough for me to pass, most of the time. It's kind of complicated.

[ergomaniac]

I'm capable of following complicated thoughts.

[sheepworrying]

Well... well I don't really know how it works, exactly. How people like me exist back home. But we do, and we're not human and we're not all wolves, we're just half-wolves.

So you see, despite what the rumors back home would have you believe, I am a noble creature. Strong and fast. Got a good sense of smell. A particular affinity for fine dining. A splendid fashion sense. Got a tail, too.

[ergomaniac]

And you also suffer from sudden bouts of amnesia.

[sheepworrying]

Er, no. You see... [He speaks very casually, almost like he's trying to sell Edgeworth a car instead of offering a very shady alibi for the night of the murder.] Being a half-wolf, I also have natural obsession with the moon. The full moon, as a matter of fact. I get a little moody, a little stir-crazy, my appetite shoots through the roof, you know, typical wolf stuff, as I understand it.

So if you'll check the calendar, you'll see that the full moon was up in the sky the night my little Leahkins died. So as a result of my, er... unique condition, I can't remember anything after the sun went down on the night of the murder! Only little bits and pieces!

[... he says proudly, like that's going to help him.]

[ergomaniac]

[This is a disaster. Edgeworth nevertheless manages to keep his dismay under control.

Sort of.]

Describe those...bits and pieces.

[sheepworrying]

[Wolf sounds very confident of this next part!]

Well, I went home from work at 6, like normal. Then I did what I always do, tied myself up and locked myself inside my apartment so I couldn't get out and cause trouble while I was suffering from my monthly cycle! And the rest is just me thrashing around the house.

Next thing I know, it's morning and the cops are banging down my door, calling me a murderer!

[ergomaniac]

[...Wait. That doesn't sound disastrous at all.]

How do you tie yourself up?

[sheepworrying]

Uh... with rope?

[ergomaniac]

Around the neck, or...?

[sheepworrying]

Sometimes! I just try to get it tight enough where it'll take me a long time to wiggle or snap out.

And then I padlock the door six times to keep me from escaping even after that. Usually, by then, the moon goes down and I'm back to my ol' charming self!

Sooo yep! I don't even remember leaving my apartment that night!

[Yeah. He sounds way, way too confident in that. Almost like... he's full of it.]

[ergomaniac]

[...Less good. "A long time" isn't "Never."]

And how far had you gotten this evening?

[sheepworrying]

I was unconscious in the bathtub when they found me. Hrrrrr... can't imagine why I was in there, but I can hardly follow my own thoughts when the moon's out.

Though I wasn't tied up anymore, obviously...

[ergomaniac]

...Were the padlocks unlocked?

[sheepworrying]

Weeeeell. The cops got in...

But cripes! That doesn't mean I went outside! I would've remembered eating someone! Especially my darling little Leahcakes!

[ergomaniac]

[...Fantastic.]

What is your apartment complex.

[sheepworrying]

Uhh... it's in Sector Four, on the border over near all that farmland. Looks out over the nicest field full of... delicious little sheep.

[ergomaniac]

What's the exact address? I'll see if I can perhaps get security footage from the lobby.

[...If that won't just make things worse.]

[sheepworrying]

Uhhh... It's... [He reads out the address.]

What's "security footage?"

[ergomaniac]

Do you know what a video camera is?

[sheepworrying]

A "video camera..." Uhhh... like on the NVs, right?

[ergomaniac]

Correct. Most apartment complexes have those installed in the lobby to monitor who comes and goes.

[sheepworrying]

... They do?

[ergomaniac]

Indeed. Is this a...relief, I hope?

[sheepworrying]

[It's clearly not, from the way Wolf is suddenly sweating like a sinner in church.]

Hrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr... oh! Oh yeah, yeah! Big relief! Huge relief!